Saturday, May 29, 2010

How we got to a State of Emergency?


Jamaicans are known to be aggressive, passionate, multi-talented individuals who strive to be the best at whatever they set their minds to. More often than not, we don't simply settle for being good at something, we want to dominate. We see that in sports(eg. Usain, Shelly-Ann, Asafa, Chris Gayle, bobsled team, Sunshine Girls, Reggae Boyz). Also, in areas challenging wits, such as Spelling Bee (Jody-Ann Maxwell), our many accomplished pilots, entrepreneurs and scientists.

Sadly, the stories we hear daily are those of individuals who are easily misled into thinking that crime pays or making a quick buck from chatting garbage wrongfully molding the weak minds of the gullible. I was watching "American Gangster: The Jamaican Shower Posse" recently, and it documented the gangs resolve to not only establish themselves in the drug and gun trade but impose a hostile takeover, killing all who stood in their way.

In more recent times, we see where several communities, labeled garrisons, are being ruled by gangs or just one don with a loyal following. Garrisons have adapted this type of "governance" for several reasons, namely:
1. People in that community cannot count on representation from government, to meet their needs as a people and enforce their rights as a citizen of that country.

2. There are those among us who feel they can do a better job as government officials but lack trust in the "system" and also was not afforded the opportunity to be a part of it.

3. The high illiteracy and impoverished state of most, if not all, residents living there.

4. Media does not adequately highlight positive role models, who possibly bore the same struggles and emerged successful through legitimate hard work.

5. Most politicians have become more concerned with playing politics than seeking to better the country. And as a result, there has been significant evidence of corruption stemming from the head of state down to a boy fresh from his mother's womb.

Youths growing up aspire to one day be the area leader that takes care of his community and one that other communities fear. Hence poverty, crime and violence continues to be a major part of our generations ruthless cycle. People look to the area don or government to solve their problem rather than hard work and dedication. Some have become comfortable with robbing, exploiting or begging those who have struggled to make something of themselves.

The web of deception spun by politicians has become so widespread that no one politician, or event, whether state of emergency or election will be able to untangle. It's going to take a concerted effort by the people of the country to decide what is best for us all and move in that direction.

I remember one night, a couple of us were hanging out and drinking and a discussion came up. It was thrown out by one radical mind that we should have schools to care for babies and train them to think for themselves, solve problems efficiently and help them blossom into well rounded, intellectual beings without all the exposure to already corrupted elements. Drastic, isn't it? Are we really that lost that we need to employ these drastic measures to find our way back?

I think until we are able to elevate our thinking higher than just ourselves or any particular political party or any one man for that matter, we will forever be stuck in the mud of turmoil, with our wheels spinning but going nowhere but down, deeper til we finally implode.
Kavon McKenzie Copyright 2010

sigh


I listen to songs that talk about how great life is and how money makes their worlds so much better. Then there are those who are drowning in despair, violence and poverty. These songs provide inspiration, comfort or even just to let me know that things could be worse.

I wake up daily and go through my usual routine. Things change so much around me that as sad as it sounds, I've gotten dependent on that constant to give me some stability. Others are of the opinion that it's not healthy but it keeps me "grounded".

I stayed up all night/morning wondering why people's views change, why one's word means nothing anymore, why does one's emotions toss and turn like the rough sea, why me, why not me?

After hours upon hours, I didn't find satisfaction in the answers I summised. So here I am, tired...frustrated...hurt...disappointed...concerned.

I also noticed something else, I'm think I've evolved. Not sure whether it's for the better or worse. No one seems to be pleased with who I am or who I've become. I hear the constant groans of disgust, disdain, disappointment, disrespect

Unsure of my direction, I step out into an uncertain world. My life means nothing to me anymore. I feel nothing. No longer wanna be something. I'm a zombie trodding on a journey that doesn't seem to be my own. This is just me taking some time to catch my breath, as I look on to the horizon


--written November 19, 2008

Kavon McKenzie Copyright 2010

Just Out of Curiousity


wat a way things change up.

why is it that if I ask somebody if a girl look good, once a dem friend, dem seh she have a nice personality? We're talking about physical attributes here, not that I'm vain or anything....well yes i am kinda vain, cuz Jah know, mi wouldnt want get a heart attack when mi wake up and see her inna di mawning. But that's a different story. So yea, if we talking bout physical, why bring up something like her personality? Never seen anyone having sex with another person's personality. Quite frankly, that concept may give the ugly girl dem wid the pop dung body the advantage, since that's their personality isnt beyond their control. Word of advice, if she nuh look, she jus nuh look good.

Man dem, what's the deal with the whole man purse, scarf, tight pants, bleach out face, eyebrow neatly thin and well done, pants deh half way down ur thighs trend that's spreading through our society? We keep adopting certain "fashion statements" from people from various other cultures and that's cool. However alot of these fads, are derived from people who we are not in support of their lifestyles, and that's putting it mildly. We still boast of how homophobic our culture is and yet, just walking on the road, I'm not exactly sure where I am. It's almost like we lost ourselves somehow or I'm the one that's lost or trapped in some parallel universe. Men have become so metro-sexual, it's scary. It's almost like the roles have been reversed. No wonder Usher a sing bout trading places. Know yourself please. Dats all mi a beg, jus understand seh there are certain things that a man is supposed to do and there are certain things he's not.

Wah a gwaan fi di excessive make up and rapunzelitis? If you nuh look good without make up, what are the odds u a go look good after? Different, yes, I'll give you dat. Maybe where you're from, anything but how u look now is acceptable and I can understand that way of thinking but as far fetched as this may seem, different is not necessarily better. Nuff girl cyaa even walk fast cuz the horse hair so heavy dem neck a strain fi hol' up dem head. Wah dat fah? From a mile out u can tell seh dat nuh real...two different texture, two different colour. nobody subtle bout nutten again. I think that's partially why mi love locks so much, dem nuh have dem problem deh. Some ppl all have rainbow colours.....jah know...stop live inna loou.

Man dem, Jah know, u find a good girl treat her right please.....mi tired fi a council oonu woman now. Dr Phil is no longer in office....him cyaa pay him bill dem....RECESSION. So all dis free councillin gone pon recession too. Women, lemme help u out likkle bit. Not everybody will be a wife, u have more woman dan man......so in other words, some woman haffi go do without or share. Some women need fi look inna demself too, u're always the girl on the side for a reason....things work out fi u so far.....why try change up now? You're an excellent secretary, why u want run di company if u have no experience and u lack know how? You just gonna end up having a secretary and CEO at ur company who dont know weh di rass dem a do. So please, know ur strengths and weaknesses......improve on them.....nothing is wrong with having high hopes but hey, u have to work towards ur goals.....cant let u run di company if u're not qualified...or maybe it's just not the right time. Be patient, it's a virtue.

Stop look other ppl man or woman and den encourage den fi leff dem other half fi u. It's quite possible that one of four things are gonna happen. 1) that person is gonna try find every reason to stay in the situation they are cuz it just may be a better option to keep u as a friend with benefits. 2)That person will be turned off by u nagging them and causing more drama or stress. so because u want all, u lose all. 3)Dat person will leave their other half for you and you'll live happily ever after. 4) Dat person will leave their other half to be with you and then sometime down the line, somebody does the same thing to dat person and you're gonna end up being left on the way side. Now dat sound like a 25% chance of happiness, so dat leaves 75%. Do you still think the odds are in ur favour?

Mi glad seh dem ban di daggering song dem. Wah a gwaan wid di jump off a building and land pon woman, di lift up and run up and dung ting, a spin like gig? Man a throw woman fi next man ketch her and fi di entire night is either di man dem a dance by demself or dem a stab behind a girl? Seriously?!?!?!? WTF?!?!? Mi nuh see the enjoyment inna dat, I guess oonu can seh me old. I mean at first it was amusing but den oonu tek it way too far, just like the fashion ting. Mi like wine pon a girl and mek she wine pon me. Mi cyaa promise nobody seh mi a go roll pon di ground and all these things.


--written March 5, 2009

Kavon McKenzie Copyright 2010

A nuh vent this...more like open air


How di raass crime and violence fi go dung inna da country yah if so much pussyhole live yah? You a provide a service and because dem put 20 cent pon gas, you put $1000 pon yuh service charge and at the same time a tell yuh employee dem say u haffi go cut cost. Real pussyhole behaviour.

You dun a mek a profit. Things gone up, you nuh want nutten cut inna da profit deh so u cut back ppl pay or cut staff so dat u can still arite. Is like u a try mek as much as u can and cut.

Bloodclaat bwoy. Mi never see a set a ppl with such a fuck up mentality nuh weh else inna di world a bumboclaat. School fee raise september gone by 4 grand, ppl pay it, by january it raise by 6 grand ppl pay it, now dem a put on 12 fuckin thousand and a say "this is regrettable and unfortunate but due to the climb in gas prices and failin economy and teacher's gettin an increase in salary, they saw it fit". Weh di bumboclaat yuh mean by "saw it fit"? A oonu same bumbohole drive man fi rob bloodclaat ppl cuz nuh matter how hard him try, oonu milk every dollar and mek man feel wutliss. Ppl like oonu mi nuh sorry fah when man dig oonu dung a road and tek weh oonu money and car.

And when ppl ccomplain bout how oon behave, the firs ting oonu bawl out, "well u have the option to move ur child to a primary school". Oonu try hold dung ppl like some real crab inna barrel. Fi oonu pocket haffi stay fat and di same man weh help u reach weh u deh a dead fi hungry. Fi oonu idea or being smart is fuckin up somebody else life so u can cris.

Right now, mi lie dung inna mi bed still. Mi sure seh work start aready but di amount a bloodclaat emotion a run thru mi head mi cyaa even move a raassclaat

Wait, oonu a go get fi oonu own man. Time will bloodclaat tell

--written May 26, 2009

Kavon McKenzie Copyright 2010

Resolve


Either love means nothing or us humans lost the meaning a long time ago. I guess it was the best thing before slice bread. But now that slice bread is out, who needs love.

We fall in lust, infatuation, in love with a flawed reflection of what the ideal person is supposed to be like. When relationships or potential relationships don't work, you say you loved that person more than anything else but it just wasn't working. You comfort yourself by saying he or she already messed up before and you gave them a chance but this is the last straw.

I encourage no one to stay in a relationship or marriage where they are constantly being abused physically or mentally. Same can be said where one or both parties neglect their vows.

Problem is, it is easy to forget that the other person is human. Just cuz the person "loves you", the pain is that much greater if you get hurt as a result of something the person did. And it's so much easier to forgive your enemy than your "lover". It is the mindset that that person knows ur likes and dislikes and therefore, it's a sin to disappoint or hurt you. The concept is understandable but somewhat misguided based on the fact that we are human. This is not an attempt to excuse the other person's actions. However, you being human usually makes you act out of accordance with the definition of true love. So it's an eye for an eye. That's not love

I am at the point where I think humans are incapable of demonstrating true love.

Based on this conclusion, it is next to impossible for anyone to say "I love you" and it has any great impact on me. Am I gone cold? No. I'm just more conscious now that "love" is a thing of convenience, as long as you treat me how I want to be treated, then I love you

**the views expressed are mine, be free to disagree...after all I disagree with every one of you**

--written June 12, 2009

Kavon McKenzie Copyright 2010